I Blocked You Today

 I blocked you today 

Because I wanted to do away with everything that reminds me of you,

Because I'm always tired of trying to get your attention,

Because I'm tired of seeing how broken you made me,

Because I'm tired of lying to myself that I'm happy elsewhere yet I'm always sitting waiting for that one hello text, a like and comment notification from you,

Because I want to be the happy girl I was before you broke me.

Well, it's time I live life like me and not after making you jealous,

Because it's time for me to be genuinely happy and let go of every resentment I have for you.

I decided today

Because we can't just unlove someone overnight,

Because few years ago on this fateful day you were a stranger to me.

For, I gave my heart, enough time to let you be.

I am honestly tired to force fate to put us together yet destiny has decided to let us go.

It is time I start making decisions for myself and not having a toxic relationship me because of the toxic urge of wanting to show you that I am happier.

I need to officially let go of my affection and intention to crave for your attention.

Because now I'm certain that I deserve better than me letting you gaslight and manipulate your existence in my life full of lies, plain I Love you texts that hardly make a difference and loosing myself wondering why I am never enough for you.

You are my person. Unfortunately, I'm not yours and that is why you we're always throwing me inside your train wreck of uncertainty.

I don't regret your existence in my life for, it taught me that love, love is not enough, for you might want to take in a bullet for someone who's pulling the trigger and won't ever jump a puddle for you.

Is this just what life is, or is it the toxic urge for someone to just find pleasure in satisfying their ego? Because when it comes to you, I find myself wondering how happy I would have been if we never crossed paths.

Maybe I'm wrong or I am right, but eitherway,

I blocked you today 

©️Wandia